Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Freaks and Geeks

First of all, does anyone but me remember that show (Freaks and Geeks) that was on NBC for like a minute a few years ago? Circa 2000? It was only on for one season, if that, and it had James Franco and Seth Rogan? I think it was produced by Judd Apatow, who of course we now know from his movies such as The 40-Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up, and Superbad (among others). Anyway, I loved that show!!! It was hilarious!!! I was so bummed when it got canceled.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand that was a huge tangent because I'm actually here today to talk to you more about ACL. And the freak show that you get to see live and in person at ACL. Don't get me wrong, I love it. My cousin said it best when she put that "anything goes" at ACL. And that pretty much sums it all up. It's a great place to go and people watch. Which I did a lot of this past weekend.

Now I'd like to point out that I am not judging. You all know me, I'm a lover not a fighter. My life philosophy is do unto others. As long as you aren't hurting anybody else, it's all good by me. Carry on. Plus, I mean, let's be honest, I am in no position to judge anyone.
But I did see some nuts there.
This guy was so high, he could barely stand upright, let along keep his eyes open. He kept leaning over to one side, slooooooooooowly, and then his buddy would push him upright and he'd leeeeeeeeeeeeean over the other side. His eyes were half closed the whole time, and he seemed to think everything was hilarious. He was having fun. God bless him.
You can see the back of this guy's head in the picture of High Guy above. I call this guy Johnny Mustache. For what I hope are obvious reasons. I have no comment about the hat. Ok, yes I do. I have a comment. I love it. Where can I get one? Johnny Mustache would you please let me have it?
Despite all evidence to the contrary, I assure you that my cousin Angela was not chemically enhanced in any way, shape or form at the time this picture was taken. She didn't even have a beer the whole time we were at ACL. Only iced tea for her and her husband, the Doctah. To tell you the truth, I'm not sure what the hell she was doing in this picture, because unlike her, I did have some beers. So I don't really remember this.

Moving on.Monchichi? Monchichi is that you? At ACL? Are you putting your little Monchichi thumb in your mouth? Or are you smoking a j? I can't tell. Take those shades of Monchichi Man and let me see you!
THIS GUY WAS AWESOME. Take a minute and carefully study this guy. Look at the shorts, in particular. Yes, they are cutoffs. Jean cutoffs. Tight jean cutoffs. Look at the facial hair situation. Handlebar mustache. Chops. Feathered sides.Here's a better shot of the face. I was unable to get any closer shots of this guy and every time I tried someone walked right in front of my camera. I didn't want to be obvious. I imagine his name is something like Steve. Or Chico. Or Robby. And I imagine that Steve/Chico/Robby dresses up like a cop in his spare time. With the whole get-up. Cop hat. Badge. Baton. Maybe even long pants if he is feeling crazy. He just has that "look" to him.

The funniest fun-ball I saw there was at the Kevin Fowler show. I didn't get any pictures of this guy, but behold! I did get a video. This video doesn't do this guy justice. He was a dancing fool. He was getting down like no one I have ever seen. He was all by himself. He was approximately 55. He. Did. Not. Care.

Ok I just watched this video and it's crap. I am sorry. I'm going to leave it here, though, because although you can't see the guy dancing, not even a little bit, what you can see is that I start to laugh as I'm watching him, and the camera starts to shake. Ang and I had tears rolling down our cheeks from watching this guy. After the show, everyone standing around him gave him high fives for all his "spectacular" moves. He looks a lot like Elaine from Seinfeld. I've been told I have a similar dancing style. This guy and I, we were kindred spirits.

That's all for my ACL posts. I will resume my regularly scheduled blogging tomorrow. I got a new job, so for awhile I'm not sure how often I'll be able to blog. I might actually have to, gasp!, work. Imagine!

Monday, September 29, 2008

Happy Birthday Mike!

My cousin Mike's birthday isn't until the end of October, but let's take a moment to wish him a happy birthday. And while we're at it, a Merry Christmas. My cousin Ang bought Mike (her brother) a 3 day pass to ACL (Austin City Limits) last year as a birthday/Christmas combo. For whatever reason, Mike could not make it down here this past weekend to attend the festival, so I used his ticket instead. Happy Birthday Mike! Merry Christmas! And thanks!For those not in the know, Austin City Limits is a 3 day music festival, held annually in downtown Austin's beautiful Zilker Park. Austin is the live music capital of the world, or so I hear. So it's a good fit. The music varies from Gospel, to children's performances, to country, to hard core rock, indie and alternative, Cuban, jazz, etc. There is quite literally something for everyone.

I did not go down on Friday, which I am bummed about because I heard I missed some awesome performances by the Eli Young Band, Patty Griffith, Alejandro Escovedo, N.E.R.D., and Jakob Dylan. Just to name a few.

Saturday and Sunday were awesome though. We saw so many great bands and performers that I already love, and we got to check out a few new acts that I will definitely be looking for next time I go to download some tunes.

I took a lot of pictures. Now, I'm sure most of you have been to concerts and attempted to take pictures. It's not exactly the easiest thing to do, especially if you are in a crowd of thousands (?), and a bit of a distance from the stage, and have had some beers. So keep that in mind when you view my pictures, and remember, I'm no Ansel Adams.

Saturday's favorites included Robert Earl Keen, who I thought I had taken some pictures of, but I can't find them. I think I thought I was taking pictures of him, but got the crowd instead. Happened a lot, I can tell you. So instead, here is a picture of REK that I didn't take.
Looks sorta like Gary Busey, no? Or Kris Kristofferson? (J that was for you)

Others that we saw Saturday include the Nachito Herrera All-Stars. These guys were awesome! A Cuban Jazz Latin type band. They totally rocked and had everyone dancing.

And Iron and Wine. A totally mellow, very dark and beautiful sound. We didn't get to see much of them, which bummed me out. But I am definitely going to be downloading some of their stuff.

My 2 favorites from Saturday were John Fogerty and Alison Krauss & Robert Plant
John Fogerty was awesome. He sang mostly CCR stuff, which was cool. You sort of forget how many great songs this man has written. Or, I should say, I sort of forgot. Every song he would start, we'd all be like "Oh yeah! John Fogerty sang this!". And let me tell you what, for an old dude, he still rocks out with his cock out. Had to say it.

Speaking of old dudes who jam out with their clams out, Robert Plant?!!!??!!!!! Oh my, he is amazing. And he and Alison Krauss paired together? Whodathunk? But it works. They were wonderful, mystical, fabulous, and lovely. Here is the only picture I got of their set. This is unfortunate.
Sunday was another day filled with great musical acts, but more importantly, it brought us this unfortunate moment in fashion.
Don't judge me, people! It was hotter than balls out there. And we were in the beating down sun. Waiting to see Blues Traveler, and the mean man in the blue shirt told me we couldn't sit under our umbrella. Oh, how I wanted to hurt that mean man. So I had to make do with what I had and what I had was this here handkerchief.

This Unfortunate Moment in Fashion was brought to you in part by The Sun, Handkerchiefs, and Blue Shirts.

So yeah, Blues Traveler. They always put on a great live show. That band loves to jam. I swear, they would sit up on that stage for 3 hours straight and jam if they could. John Popper makes sweet sweet love to that harmonica.
And while we're on the subject of big boys who jam out, let's talk about Gnarls Barkley. If you're anything like me, then you know approximately one Gnarls Barkley song and it goes like this

Well kids I am here to tell you that Gnarls Barkley is pretty damn good. There are two of them, and I don't know which one is Gnarls and which one is Barkley, but whatever, that big dude pictured above knows how to GET DOWN. I was very impressed. And this time we were allowed to use our umbrellas, so suck on that Mr. Blue Shirt.

My favorite performance of the whole festival (and I know people are going be like, Are you SERIOUS?) was Kevin Fowler on Sunday night. Look, I live in Texas now, and I am country. Kevin Fowler is as country as they come, but that redneck puts on one hell of a good show.

He is entertaining, funny, and he engages the crowd.
We stayed and watched a bit of the Foo Fighters on Sunday night, and they sounded good from where we were. Which is to say, very very far away. We didn't see too much of them, and we left early before their show was over to avoid the crowds.

So thanks again Mike. Hope you get something else you can't use for your birthday or Christmas this year. Like a new car. Or a cruise. Or a new Coach purse. Just give me a call.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Chillin' with my Gnomies

Just when you thought I couldn't get any weirder (it's ok, go ahead and admit it, you think I'm a circus freak, and you're not entirely wrong), I have a confession for you today that will really push it over the edge. If you know me IRL, then you already know about my little collection (problem, obsession, all consuming need for) of Garden Gnomes.

I don't know when it started, or why, but I can't get enough. So today, because I'm feeling extra funky, I thought I'd go ahead and confess my obsession to you and introduce you to my posse of GnomeBoys.

We will begin with The Brothers - the first 3 gnomes I ever owned, given to me for Christmas one year by the Cowboy's parents.

There is Harold, holding his watering can, tending to the rosemary.

And Simon, holding his prized radish. Simon had a terrible fall 2 weeks ago. "Someone" was sweeping up the porch and knocked Simon over. He broke right in half, and his hat was shattered into many smaller pieces. I managed to put his 2 halves back together, but his hat is missing a big piece at the top. It was pretty bad carnage, and I choose not to show you a picture of the current Simon. This is him in his former, complete state.This is Nigel, also known as The Roaming Gnome. Last year some of my "friends" thought it would be hilarious to steal Nigel from my back yard and photograph him all over the country doing various things, and send me pictures and notes from him. Real funny stuff. I'm still laughing....... uh huh. Anyway, the kidnappers weren't the smoothest or most experienced, and they sent me the following picture of Nigel at the beach.
Look closely at the upper right hand corner of the photo. Notice anything written in the sand? Anything that resembles a name? Anything that resembles the name of a certain friend I have with awesome hair and a nickname that rhymes with testicle?
Nice try, Wes. You're gonna have to get up earlier than that to pull one off on ol' Caps, though. Nigel was returned safely and now resides in the guest bedroom of our house. He is no longer allowed to go outside, for fear he will take off.

This is Squeaky. He's the smallest of all my gnomes, and stands about 3 inches tall. Squeaky is my Gnitting Gnome, and lives in my stash box with all my yarns.
This is a terrible picture of Gerald. Gerald is the front door Gnome. He is attached to a "Welcome" sign that greets visitors when they come to our home.Dudley and Otis were a gift from a former student of mine, and are a rain gauge.
The Gno Evil Gnomes are named Huey, Louie and Dewy.This is Pappy, and he is taking a little gnap. Please don't disturb him.
Shhhh, speaking of sleeping, here is my old pal Chadwick, the Gnight Time Gnome, reading a bed time story to his buddy Gavin. Chadwick is currently on Sabbatical in Michigan, but he should be home for the holidays.This chap was also a gift from the Cowboy's parents. I love how they accept my complete quirkiness, and fully support it. He was a gift for my 30th birthday, and when I opened him at the party, I said "Oh, we will have to think of a good gname for him!". My friend Megan's little boy, Jacob (age 4) was there and he said "Santa!!!" I guess to a child, he does sort of resemble St. Gnick, so I went ahead and named him Santa Gnome.

Another birthday gift, this one from The Cuteness' parents, and his name is Barney. I made the mistake of putting him gnext to Pappy in the garden, and clearly, he got the impression that it's acceptable to do gnothing but sleep all the time.

And this fella here is the newest addition to my Gnomies. See how shiny and beautiful he is? I did that. I painted him myself. He was just a blank, white gnome until I came along and made him what he is today. He's a true work of art, don't you think? Because of that, he had to have an appropriate gname. So I'd like to introduce you to: Michaelangegnome. Mike will also be an indoor gnome.

Those are my boys! I don't have any girl gnomes, and I rarely see them. My boys don't gneed any distractions anyway.

I can assure you of several things. First, I gnever claimed to be gnormal. Second, these gnames that I just listed above were gnot made up for purposes of this blog. All of my gnomes are gnamed as soon as I bring them home. Third, gnow you (g)know what to get me for Christmas.

Hope you all have a great weekend!

Monday, September 22, 2008

Knitting? Did someone say knitting?

It appears that I've lost sight of why I started this blog in the first place. It seems that I've been busy blogging about Monchichi, meatballs, deodorant and Ron Paul. It happens.

I have, however, been knitting. Really, I have. Mostly I've been knitting for all those babies, and also some Christmas gifts, which obviously I can't post pictures of here. But just to prove that I have in fact been knitting, here are some pictures.

Here is little Sophia Grace wearing the hat and booties I knit for her. You can't really see my fine craftsmanship in this picture, so let me show you another picture.
These were so easy to make, and the pom-pom maker I bought at Michaels was really a good little investment because it really jazzed up the hat.

I made another felted bracelet bag.

And two more garter stitch scarves.

A bunch more coasters.....

And a Go Blue!! Eyeglasses case. (I still support my team even when they lose.....to Notre Dame.....and Utah.....)
And I cast on for another Sunday Market Shawl, this time using the recommended yarn (Noro Cash Iroha). Hopefully this one will turn out better than my last, which, coincidentally, I ended up frogging after all was said and done (a very sad day, let me tell you).

I also made some more slippers, but don't have a picture.

So you can see, I have been busy knitting. I just don't always want to blog about my knitting. And since I'm the boss of this here blog, I guess that is my prerogative. I can do what I want to do. It's my prerogative. No one can tell me what to do. Tell me, tell me whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy can't Iiiiiiiiiiiii live my liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiife.

Ok, I'll stop now.
Dogs in Diapers!
Have a great week!

Friday, September 19, 2008

Yearbook Photos

I found another fun website. Ok, I didn't find it, my friend Marlene did, and I am totally copying her. This website is awesome and hours of fun can be wasted when you're supposed to be "working" but don't feel like it. Say, on a Friday afternoon. After you eat a big fat lunch of BBQ chicken quesadillas. And then it's only 2 and you have 3 hours to kill. And you don't want to be obvious about the fact that you're not working, so you can't, hypothetically (of course) pull out your knitting and draw attention to the fact that you're not doing shit. Instead you want to appear that you're working, and in order to do that, you need to be doing something on the computer. So this website can help with that. Also, scatter some papers on your desk. Make it look like work. That is my little tip from me to you today. You can thank me later.

It's Yearbook Yourself and the way it works is you upload a head shot of yourself, or your unsuspecting boyfriend, as the case may be, and then you can drop it into head shots from yearbooks between the years 1950-2000.

That is what I call good, clean fun. See my results.
This is me in 1956. Did girls really wear their hair like this back then? Had they no sense at all? Let's take a look at The Cowboy from the same year.
Oh, clearly he wins this round. I think he looks rather handsome in 1956. Sort of, dare I say, Al Gore-like. Me like.

Here he is in 1960. This look doesn't work for him. I do not enjoy the crew cut, nor the Sally Jesse Raphael glasses. Speaking of glasses.

1964. Oh this is attractive. I look like someone. It is reminding me of something....I just can't.....think....of......who..............Could it be SATAN???????
1968. Funny what 4 years will do to ya. This hairstyle is actually kind of cute on me, if I do say so myself. Too bad I could never in a million years get my hair to cooperate like that.
1970. Wait, I thought we decided the glasses don't work for you. Neither does the toupee. Or the plaid jacket. Or the wide tie. This is bad bad bad. Thankfully the Cowboy wasn't born until 1976, but I bet we could find a picture of the Cowboy's dad looking eerily similar to this one.

1972. I shouldn't attempt to wear fake hair either, I guess.1976. Oh this one is my very favorite. I love it. I actually think it looks like a real picture, and I know that once we enter the 80's things are going to get ugly, so I'm stopping right here with 1976. No, just kidding. But let's do take a look at what the Cowboy would have looked like this year, and what kind of couple we'd have made.Oh. Never mind then. I can't go out with a guy whose hair looks better than mine. And also, who wears a v-neck sweater and turtleneck combo. The Cowboy was way too pretty in '76 for me.
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Now don't mess with my 1984 hair, beyotch. It will knock you into next Tuesday. Tease that bad boy up with some White Rain, throw on my acid-washed jacket, hop in my t-top Camero and pop in my White Snake cassette tape. Aw yeah. That's how I roll.
1988 Cowboy. That is what we call a mullet, friends. Back then, according to my delusional friend Lisa, they were called a "bi-level". She only says that to make herself feel better about the fact that she had one, but there is no denying that that is a mullet. I do not like the Cowboy with a mullet. But at least he's not wearing a v-neck anymore. Thank God for that.

1990. This, ladies and gentleman, is what I strived for as a young adult. I wanted my hair to look like this so badly. It never did. My hair is very thin and doesn't hold a curl. I never had good mall hair. My friend Shauna did. She had great mall hair. And a great mall name. Shauna. Me? Nope and nope.My hair more closely resembled this one. This is 1996, the actual year I graduated from high school. I wish I had one of my senior pictures, because I would post it. I'm not scared. I will try to find it. Right along with that Strawberry Shortcake picture I promised. But it doesn't really look like this picture. For one, I didn't have blond hair (despite my best attempts with Sun-In, a product I do NOT endorse). For two, I would have never been caught dead wearing a denim vest in high school. But other than that, this picture looks pretty authentic, don't you think?

Oh no. The years between 88 and 98 were not kind to the Cowboy. He packed on the el bees. And what is the deal with the Backstreet Boy hair?

I think I clearly won the contest of who looks better over the years.

Oh wait. We have a last minute entry from my friend Heather.We have a winner.