Sunday, June 22, 2008

Ansel Adams, Shmansel Shmadams.

There is a reason, a very valid reason, why I did not own a camera until approximately a year and a half ago. There is also a reason why The Cowboy, who is actually a very good amateur photographer, does most of the picture taking when we go on trips. I will now demonstrate to you why it is that I should not be allowed to operate a photograph taking device. I give you now, a lesson in drunken photography.
First, you must drink a margarita the size of your head. It matters little if this margarita is very weak, for you will just purchase an additional shot of tequila to spice 'er up.

Second, it is imperative that you follow up this monstrous sized margarita with a beer.

Or three.
(you can see, I'm sure, that this will not end well)

Then, let the games begin.

Tip #1) Taking pictures of buildings at night, without a flash, is a great way to capture the way a building know, in the dark. Below, I demonstrate this technique with the most well known building in San Antonio. You may not be able to recognize it in the dark like that. I call this one "Alamo at Night". Can anyone guess why?

Tip #2) You will not regret capturing all the fun times you and your friends are having. In years to come you will look back on all the joy you see in these pictures (as seen on Tiff's face, above) and laugh at all the memories.

Sometimes it even helps to take these pictures out of focus. Here, I've captured half of Johnny's face, and also some of the good times the people behind him were having. This one is called "Johnny Abstract".

Tip #3) Using props, and playing "make believe" can lead to some really great pictures. Don't be afraid to use your imagination. Below, I've taken an advertisement for George Strait's new CD, and cleverly turned it into a very realistic picture of me kissing George. Now, don't worry, I didn't actually meet George Strait. But who can tell the difference? Huh??

Tip #4) Think outside the box. Anyone can take pictures of themselves drinking giant margaritas and kissing ads. But sometimes you've got to look around to find the REALLY great shots.

A ledge.

The inside of my purse.

The sidewalk.

And lastly, who can resist the ever popular Drunken Self Photo? (tip #5). We've all been there. We've all done it. These pictures rarely turn out good, and if yours are anything like mine, then your head always appears to be the size of a medium watermelon. But still we continue to drink and still we continue to take pictures of ourselves from arm's length. Here is the best of those shots that evening, where upon I am showing my love for The Cowboy. He looks thrilled.

Thus concludes the lesson for the day. Class dismissed.

(seriously, though, we had a good time in San Antonio...real pictures and story of weekend will follow tomorrow)

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